- - - take a breath.

[beau wilkerson]

It seemed that Beau Wilkerson's life was destined to continue its downward spiral. Things seemed to have been going alright for once, as he was still with Zara and they were relatively happy. But then, Savannah and Lisette started to confront him about his abusive ways, and eventually details about his family life had spilled. He hated that people knew those things about him, but they had been relentlessness with him and he couldn't keep it all in. Now there were quite a few people who knew that his mother and he were victims of abuse from his father, something that he didn't like to advertise. He never wanted to seem like the victim, he never wanted to seem like he had weaknesses, that he could hurt. The atmosphere that he'd been raised in had turned him into someone who hid his emotions, who made it seem like nothing could effect him. Today was one of those days where he just couldn't hide it. He had woken up with a frown on his face, and it only got worse through the day. His parents were fighting again, and when he heard his mom scream from the opposite room it struck a nerve with him. Yes, he was used to it, but today he refused to listen to it any longer. He stormed into the room and confronted his father, which ended in a pretty huge fight - he was not the victor, and although he had tried to defend his mother, he escaped with an eye that was already beginning to bruise and a bleeding lip. Beau's first reaction was a coursing anger that burned through his entire body, so much that he ended up wrecking his room quite a bit. After that, he lit a cigarette and drank a beer, but neither of those things did anything for him. He could feel himself crumbling, and that was never a good thing. He usually disliked himself, but when he was vulnerable he hated himself. The young man left the house without a word to either of his parents, although he did flash his mother a pained, apologetic look. He was sorry, sorry that he couldn't be a better son and protect her from that miserable bastard. Beau had all his things with him, like his phone, cigarette, and keys, but he double-checked before heading to the park. It was sunset, and it calmed him to be outside when not many people were around. His favorite bench was empty by the time he reached it, so he sat down heavily and lit a cigarette for the second time that day. Taking a deep drag, he watched the smoke curl from the corners of his lips in small, delicate gray wisps. Suddenly his shoulders slumped and he cradled his head in his hands, the cigarette falling from his lips and burning uselessly on the ground in front of him. His lip had split again from the motion of smoking, so he did his best to dab away the small tickle of blood as he inhaled and exhaled slowly. Since when had his life been such a living hell? Comforted by the fact that no one was around but still hating his weakness, Beau reached up with his hand to wipe something else from his face - a tear, something that he hadn't seen in a while.

T A G G E D, savannah calico munroe.
S T A T U S , done.
N O T E S ,

[/b] SO SAD. D:
O U T F I T ,[/b] i tried to match the banner.
C R E D I T ,[/b] banner to me, lyrics to jobros.
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[savannah munroe]

Savannah's day had seemed to drag on endlessly. As each hour pushed on and on and every minute along it seemed to take years to dart away, her attitude was dropping. It was just one of those days that wasn't suiting her in the least and the more bored and unamused she was, the more frustrated she would get at little things. Now that the evening had come into her view, if you were to have asked her what in the world she had been doing the entire day, she really would not have been able to give you anything special. She didn't leave the house and go see one of her friends, she had even ignored a few texts that had been thrown in her direction. She had laid around in her bed and only left to wander downstairs to grab a bite to eat or something to drink. All she really wanted was to be left alone. She wasn't quite sure why, but this wasn't her day to be the chatty cathy that she usually was. It was quite a shame whenever this side of Savannah came out though, but at least nobody ever really saw it. Eyes glancing at the clock on her night stand, it finally occurred to her that she wanted to do at least one productive thing before moving on to the next day of her life. So, her legs wandered over to her desk as she bent over slightly and blew out two of the candles that she had lit to add a more serene mood to her room. Grabbing her most cherished digital camera, she slipped on some flip-flops and wandered out of her room. Savannah didn't grab her bag, she didn't grab her cell phone, nothing. She hadn't even slipped into clothes that didn't make it look like she didn't give a shit about her appearance. This was her time. Just like the rest of the day had been, only this time around she would actually be entertained. And since Savannah planned to go to the park, she highly doubted she would bump into anyone she knew; especially with the time that it already was. Her legs moved swiftly in the direction of the park as soon as she left her home and the very second that her feet were placed on that familiar path, she felt relaxed. Her camera was up against her face half of the time she walked, seeing the beautiful world in front of her through a lens. Sometimes the flash would go off, sometimes it would not, but every time she heard that gentle click of the camera that always seemed to relax her. She had been walking for a while before she suddenly came to a halt in the middle of the path, bringing the camera down to her chest as she flipped through the gorgeous images. Her mind seemed to be completely distracted and that was because it was. Just as Savannah brought the camera back up to her face, she brought it back down almost immediately at the sight of someone just a few yards away from her. She walked closer until she knew for a fact that it was him and when she knew it for a fact, her heard could have come to a complete halt. "Turn around.. Go home.."

The thought rushed through her head quickly, but she still found herself walking closer to him, stopping just a few feet away. Those icy blue eyes of hers couldn't help but stare for a moment. ".. Beau?"

[/color] Her voice was awfully gentle and soft. By the way she had been acting all day, you would have thought she would have sounded anything less of bitchy. "Are.. Are you okay?"[/color] He obviously wasn't. It was a stupid question and she was stupid for even being there talking to him. But she couldn't help it.

M U S I C , cowboys game.
S T A T U S , completee!
N O T E S , awwh<3
C L O T H I N G , right here.

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[beau wilkerson]

He would have given anything to trade his life for someone else's, so that he could enjoy a 'boring' night at home. Things would be nice and peaceful like it should be, and maybe his parents would actually love each other. Usually he didn't waste his time thinking of what could have been, but he wasn't in the most upbeat mood so he couldn't help his mind from wondering. Beau might have grown up into the person he knew he could be - gentle, charming, and easygoing. He would have probably had many friends, participated in normal activities, and been happy. He wouldn't have lost the girlfriends that he'd had, he wouldn't have so many people who generally disliked him, if things had been different for him. Beau's jaw clenched with a wave of anger, but as quickly as it came it faded away. Everything was hurting right now, and he wished that he could make it all disappear. There was no cure for this, he was irreparable; no one could make him whole again. In fact, he didn't even want to see anyone at that moment. He couldn't trust himself, when his emotions were so unsteady. For all he knew, he could either hurt them, or end up completely collapsing in on himself and sobbing. The latter situation would be endlessly mortifying to him, but it was out of his hands. It seemed like everything was out of his control, at this point in his life. There was no way to avoid it - the constant aching in his chest was because his heart was broken into so many pieces that he couldn't even recognize it. Beau heard footsteps coming toward him, but he couldn't lift his heavy head to look at who it was. He doubted it was anyone that knew him, anyway. A familiar voice came from the silence and startled him, so he forced himself to meet the eyes of none other than Savannah Munroe. He must have been a sight, with his slightly reddened eyes, his bleeding lip, and his nicely bruising left eye. She looked beautiful as ever, with that camera slung around her neck - he remembered when she used to turn it on him and take a million pictures, and although he acted as if he were angry he simply laughed it off after a while. Those days seemed so far in the past to him, now. Beau's brow furrowed deeply at he question, wondering why the hell she even cared about him. He was the sick bastard that had hurt her. His hazel eyes drilled into her blue ones, his body trembling with indignation and his mouth set into a hard line. He dared her to laugh at him, dared her to say anything cruel about the way he looked. When she did neither of those things, he slumped again and shook his head once, slowly. "No," he replied, his voice cracking on the single word. Silence fell between them, and then he turned his head away. "No." The word was repeated, and he choked on it as he fought another wave of tears. All he wanted was to get away, to make everything stop, but he couldn't do that, could he? He couldn't hide this part of himself from Savannah, but in the end it would be best if she just turned away. As far as she was concerned, he deserved very ounce of misery coursing through his veins.

T A G G E D, savannah calico munroe.
S T A T U S , done.
N O T E S ,

[/b] poor bb.
O U T F I T ,[/b] i tried to match the banner.
C R E D I T ,[/b] banner to me, lyrics to jobros.
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[savannah munroe]

As Savannah's eyes gazed across that more than just slightly familiar figure, everything that he had told her about his home life came flying right back into her head. His words became more vivid in her mind when he looked up at her; those eyes that were growing a reddish color, his cracked lip with that crimson gently slipping through it and one of his eyes bruising up. The countless tears that had filled her blue eyes for this guy, the countless times that her eyes had grown red because of it. All of those times she had to take out cover up to blend in her bruises. Everything that he had ever done to her and he was now doing to other people had been put on him. So, why was it that Savannah couldn't allow a grin to form on her lips? Revenge was supposed to be sweet. She was supposed to like the fact that he was getting a taste of his own medicine. But, the truth of it all was, that wasn't who Savannah was and never would she want to be that kind of girl. When her eyes met his own and his seemed to bore right into her soul, she didn't say a word. Her heart seemed to have sunk quite a bit at the sight of him like this. He was obviously broken; pushed way too far over the edge. She didn't want to feel bad for him and she knew that he didn't want anyone feeling bad for him either. Even as his head turned away from her, her eyes stayed glued to him as she listened to his single word that he repeated twice, the emotion behind it breaking her up even more. Savannah's hands came to her camera as she pulled it up over her head and cradled it gently in her hands. Before she could stop herself, her right foot came forward and slowly, her left foot followed. What was she doing? He was going to hurt her. She knew it. Why the hell couldn't she just turn in the other direction and leave him there? If Maddox had known what she was doing, he would have flipped a shit on her. Slowly approaching him, she took a seat next to him on the bench, leaning over to place her camera down on a soft patch of grass next to the bench. Sitting up straight, Savannah's eyes looked at the view straight ahead of her as she took a silent deep breath. She was scared, there was no denying it. But, she was doing everything to not show it. "Nobody.."

The word came out of her mouth after a few seconds of what felt like an incredibly long silence. Her head turned to face him and she placed her arms on her legs, leaning forward. "Not even you... deserves this."

[/color] Pausing for a moment she shook her head slightly before she adverted her eyes back over to the ground ahead of her. "I'm sorry, Beau.."[/color]

M U S I C , lua by bright eyes.
S T A T U S , completee!
N O T E S , :c
C L O T H I N G , right here.

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[beau wilkerson]

He was waiting for the inevitable peal of laughter that would come from Savannah, or maybe the cutting words that she would have for him. He figured she'd have a mouthful, after what he'd done to her. Yes, most of the girls had been deeply scarred by his physical abuse, but Sav had seemed to take it particularly hard. The look of fear in her eyes whenever she saw him was enough to make him regret ever laying a hand on her. It should have been enough to stop him from hurting someone else, but he couldn't break the mean cycle that easily. When the constant flow of abuse and neglect flowed from home, it was hard for him not to keep it going elsewhere. Beau hated himself when he hit Zara, Lisette, or Savannah, but in order for him to stop, he had to make some major changes in his life. He wasn't quite sure if he could force himself to do that, so he was caught in this uncomfortable lingo. Instead of walking away, as she should have done, the brunette took the time to examine the damage done to his battered face, and what did he see in her face? Not happiness, not satisfaction.. sadness. She was sorry he had to suffer like this, despite what he'd done to her. The force of that hit him particularly hard, and he couldn't bring himself to meet her brilliant blue gaze. She was the bigger person here, she was being incredibly indulgent and strong to even be standing so close to him. And then, just when he thought she couldn't get any more incredible, she set her camera down and took the seat besides him. His entire body stiffened, just as hers did, and for a long moment they sat in tense silence. What words were even supposed to come to him, in a scenario like this? She was scared of him, he could feel the fear rolling off her small frame in waves, and yet she stayed. Beau's heart wrenched after she spoke, his hazel eyes glancing over and noticing the way she kept her eyes on the ground. He wasn't going to hurt her, but then again, his anger was so unpredictable that she was right to be cautious. "You're wrong," he croaked, shaking his head back and forth as he'd done previously. "I deserve this, and more. If you're lucky, I'm going in for black eye number two sometime soon. Maybe a hit or two to my nose." Beau's voice was hard as he spoke, but he was audibly tired. There was no energy left in him to put up a facade, or even pretend as if he were fine. He was broken, and it was obvious for her to see. Savannah should enjoy it while she could. "Don't be," he replied after a long pause, his brow furrowing deeply. I'm the one who should be sorry. And I am. I'm sorry." Beau didn't want to see her hurting ever again, nor did he want to be the one to cause that pain. It was taxing to be the villain in every scenario, but no story ever had room for an aggressive, quick-tempered, alcoholic prince charming.

T A G G E D, savannah calico munroe.
S T A T U S , done.
N O T E S ,

[/b] i'm amazed that i continue to depress myself.
O U T F I T ,[/b] i tried to match the banner.
C R E D I T ,[/b] banner to me, lyrics to jobros.
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[savannah munroe]

Savannah had absolutely no reason to stick around in Beau's presence. He had done nothing for her to deserve even a minute of her time and she was well aware of it. When her eyes had first landed on him, a jolt of anger had pulsed through her body. It was a feeling that came across her whenever she saw him or his name was mentioned. She wasn't just angry when she saw him or heard his name, though. She was sad, she was confused. It was one huge elixir of emotions that she couldn't quite figure out. But, the second that his eyes met hers, it was enough to tug at her heartstrings. She couldn't help but remember how she had felt whenever he had hit her, how her two other friends probably felt when he had done the same to them. But, as much as he did deserve it, Savannah couldn't bring herself to believe that. She didn't want him to go through all of this. Because if he wasn't going through this, maybe he would be able to get his act together and be honestly happy. She didn't know what was running through her head when she took a seat next to him; probably nothing since she obviously wasn't thinking to do something like that. He was upset and hurt.. There were so many different ways that this could go down. She wasn't surprised when he said she was wrong and she said nothing and didn't even flinch. But, as soon as he started talking about what else he possibly had coming his way, Savannah had started shaking her head again. She allowed her body to slouch, trying not to get emotional by what he was saying. Usually, you would rarely see Savannah crying, but nowadays she was constantly trying to hold herself back from exactly that. "What do you mean 'if i'm lucky'?"

She asked him, her voice suddenly coming out more frustrated then she had meant it to. "I don't want you to be hurt, Beau.. I want your dad to stop.. I want you to stop."

[/color] Finally, Savannah's eyes had turned to look over at him. With every passing moment that she was there, she could feel more courage growing in her. When he apologized to her, she couldn't help but tear her eyes away from him again. "It's over. It's in the past."[/color] It was all she could manage to say in that usual soft tone of hers before she sighed softly. She was saying that, but did she really feel that way? Savannah wasn't even sure. Of course she wanted to shove all of this in the past. But, she couldn't help but still be hurt by it. The truth of it was, Savannah was never going to forget what he did to her or that flicker of aggression and anger in his eyes as her own glazed over with tears. It was impossible. But, all she could manage to try to do was shove it out of her memories.

M U S I C , tyra talking about abusive relationships. hahahah.
S T A T U S , completee!
N O T E S , ily.
C L O T H I N G , right here.

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